If you haven't wasted some time here yet...you need to. Here are some of my favorites:
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely, Unicorns
Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma's a witch.
Sincerely, The Titanic
Dear Fork,
I understand that we haven't spoken since I ran away with dish, but I thought you should know that you have a son. His name is spork. He has your hair.
Sincerely, Spoon
Dear J.K. Rowling,
Your books are entirely unrealistic. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
Sincerely, Anonymous.
Dear Nickelback,
That's enough.
Sincerely, The World
Dear Stephenie Meyer,
I'm sorry your fans are so obnoxious. Try using less glitter.
Sincerely, J.K. Rowling
Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea... Just kidding! They're all dead.
Sincerely, BP
Dear Justin Bieber,
Ariel would really love her voice back.
Sincerely, King Triton
Dear Rose,
There was definitely room on that raft for the both of us.
Sincerely, Jack
Dear Titanic,
OM NOM NOM.
Sincerely, Iceberg
